Operation Cockup
by
4195996 LAC John Crouch
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29 May 58, according to RAF records, on this day I was posted to Cyprus from RAF Stanmore/Bentley Priory. In an all-day trip on a civvy aircraft via Malta with a quick cuppa tea with goat's milk. I wouldn't have minded quite so much, but I tipped the waitress and we couldn't even drink it. Anyway, we arrived at transit camp Nicosia where we spent a day or two. Jock (Tom Slight) whom I first met at Middle Wallop on a fighter plotters course, and who was then posted to RAF Stanmore with me. We used the NAAFI while in transit, waiting for transport to go to RAF Cape Greco 751 Sigs Unit, which was an outpost of RAF Ayious Nikolaos. There we were greeted by Tex, the one and only RAF policeman, helped by a Turk auxiliary who looked like a heavyweight wrestler armed with a Greener shotgun. Tex, on the other hand, was 6'+ and about 11.5 stone. 'Where have you come from?" asked Tex. "Transit Nicosia, why?" "Christ your lucky, it's just had a bomb go off in the NAAFI ,with people killed."
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Days later, a driver, who was down there, said there were bits and pieces of body parts all over the Nissan hut, stuck to the ceiling everywhere. He said EOKA put the bomb in the juke box. Several things happened while I was over there, but it's hard getting them in the right order. After a week or so, just to get out of camp, I volunteered to go shotgun on a 3-ton Bedford with a hatch in the roof. Anyway, I drew a .303 and 10 rounds and away we went. What an adventure! Well after a few weeks you begin to wonder if the barbed wire is to keep THEM out or YOU in. So, the convoy bounced along the dirt road on to Paralimni, where the good road starts. We had heard stories already from the drivers about the number of ambushes in and around the village but no stories from the RAF Regiment, as they seemed to keep themselves to themselves. All that is, except one Regiment driver who came from London the same as myself. Anyhow, here we went through Paralimni, Land Rover front and back of the convoy, which consisted of water bowsers, three-tonners and a coach for the living out personnel. Suddenly, I saw the driver of the truck in front knock Jock's legs from under him, so I went down as well. Then I saw the sun shining on the cheese wire that was spread across the road, which was meant for us. That's the second time they missed out on getting me.
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About two months later, brown knee's GSM & Clasp, and compulsory scab's on knee's. (Least the RAF Regiment Sgt. said they were) We were sitting in the movie marquee sucking on a can, when over the Tannoy came 'RAF Regiment to the armouries. "Well I might as well go", I thought. When I got to the armoury, the Sgt. said, "You're not even in uniform. Go and get your beret at least", which I did and then got one Sten with one mag. Where people were forming up by the guard sand bag emplacement, the CO was screaming for cans of petrol. (It's not that far I thought) how innocent can you be. "What's happened?", I asked someone. "They tried to blow up the ambulance on its way back from A.N. just as we started to get on the truck one bloke broke his watch on the tail gate." "That's a watch they owe me", he said. "Was it?" I thought. So there we went, about 2100hrs with tins of petrol and not very happy people. When we got there we were told to get all the people out of their houses, and to herd them into the centre of the village. So Tex, the cop and I set off. We had only gone 50 yards, when two young Cypriot men came towards us waving their arms around and laughing. When I turned around, I could see what they were laughing at. My mate Tex, white cap and all, was gone. So I'm saying, "Halt! Halt! Halt!", but they were still coming forward. "Shall I fire, Is it cocked, should I even be there in civvies except for the beret, maybe they think I'm EOKA?" I didn't say halt, stermata, dare (Greek and Turk for halt). Bloody hell what a cock up. Anyway, just like in the films the hero came this time in the shape of the RAF Regiment Bren gunner, all 15 stone of him. "He told you to stop", he told the Cyps then with two thumps of the butt they went down like a sack of spuds. We dragged them up to the square or what have you, along with all the rest of them, men, women, and kids. The CO Sqdn. Ldr. McDonald was asking them if they could speak English, only he was asking them in French and German. What a joke, only it wasn't funny. The smell of the petrol, 20 armed men, someone screaming at you in German, I began ,to wonder if I had slipped back in time. By this time the kid's were crying, the women and old men were almost on there knee's thought, the bastards are going to tell us to shoot them. Just then, the army turned up with the Cyp police. The CO got Court Martialed because the ambulance was never bombed. There was a bullet hole in the windscreen from Suez that was never fixed, and there was a corporal medic who had been PPP in Cyprus a week, who drove the ambulance over a bump in the road and the back doors flew open, so he thought it was a bomb.
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